After I broke my leg in 2020, my adrenals were all used up and there was nothing left for unsafe situations or physically or emotionally difficult situations. I tried all kinds of things but finally decided to listen to the pitiful cries coming from inside me and I acknowledged that I was hurting myself and I told that fearful girl that I was sorry. I had to keep trying to heal.

Fast forward 4 years later after my broken leg and, in hindsight, I had so many boundaries and boxes around me that I didn’t know when my adrenals would be strong enough for me to step outside of the safety zone I had created for myself.

I see a paradox of opposite truths; my primary goal was safety for my nervous system. But this sense of safety led to feeling numb. Almost like a prison.

Now I am leaning into spark and taking time to listen to that still small voice guiding me with safety. For me, finding God and goodness, again, means finding a balance of creativity, beauty, nature and safety. 

I decided to move toward my dreams after my thyroid was removed in 2013 and spent 6 years styling and photographing everything. This was an exciting, exhilarating time to be seeking beauty.

After 6 years I ended up seeing the need for a change because I was burnt out. It turns out that I was an adrenaline junkie on low adrenaline. This meant that after a photoshoot it took me days to recover and rest. It was an all time “high and low.” I decided a more “even keel” approach would be healthier. I decided that creativity that took less energy would be best for my nervous system. I decided to pursue “even keel.” I thought that outdoor, plein air, painting would be the next best thing. 

I have been painting for 3 and a half years! I can’t believe it. I started with no experience. I learned from Youtubers. Only in the past year did I start getting a sense of my possible work flow! 

Creative Breakthroughs Lately:

The week I started filming my first vlog (watch here) I had many breakthroughs. It was a hard time and a time of freedom. I keep experiencing the same (Artist’s Way) truths over and over again in my creative journey. I always experience difficult transitions and resistance. I had just experienced a double whammy of household projects and ill health. Coming back to creative work was extremely difficult. 

I ask myself all the questions (which is really just Resistance). Why am I doing this? When will I make enough money? What exactly should I be pursuing? More resistance: If I try to do too many different things, will it lessen the quality and the potential financial outcome? Sometimes resistance has a ring of truth.

Plein Air Painting Breakthrough

• Driving 2 hours by myself 

• dressing appropriately

• protection from the sun 

• going slow 

• taking all the tools 

• allowing for listening to my inner guide each step of the way, 

• reaching for happiness despite my inherited and inherent sadness and “undeserving of happiness” 

• not forgetting my health and hoping not to have to rest for days when I get home

The tools 

• plein air painting stuff with backpack 

• big cam 

• fanny pack 

• and selfie stick 

• lunch picnic snacks

On this particular “breakthrough” kind of day, I went to the Flower House Cafe by myself for the first time. I climbed up the Ebey’s Landing hill and it felt good, fit a selfie tripod in a fanny pack and that felt good. The wildflowers were amazing, astonishing, and glorious.

I am inspired to do “ALL the things” right now. I have a fresh vision for my life/artist vocation. I got over some bumps in the road and can see the lay of the land. My core is “Creative” & “Maker…”

Thank you for joining me! I look forward to our connection here!

…Adrenaline felt like God. Creativity. Beauty. Nature.

I’d been trying to feel God in the stillness and the safety net. I’m not going to lie; most of the time I’ve felt numb. I’ve been looking for spark. Because spark feels like God. I’ve been leaning into spark and moving toward it. Leaning in. And because I’m giving spark attention -it is happening.

The next time you are feeling dead or numb inside, consider leaning toward spark. Stop, look and listen. Lean in. That’s right! You're on your way! Stay curious about what is “lighting up your life.”

My Spiritual growth in the past couple years has not been exciting but nervous system calming and looking for safety above all. 

A few years ago, I did a self help course called “Transformation Time” taught by my artist friend Monica. This course was a turning point for me and I highly recommend it. A few of the top tools, for me, are facing ALL your fears with the truth and being 100% responsible for your happiness. 

“How to Really Live In This World” comes to mind. This is what I wanted and knew that my counselors were not going to teach me after many years in and out of therapy. The TT self help course came to me in the same season I voiced these words: how do I really live in this world?

If you are a creative, artist, empath, HSP, introvert, INFJ and/or neurodivergent, then you might relate.

Will you respond, in the comments, and share your top self-help Tools and/or Resources with us? You never know who it might help!

Stay Creative!

Creative/Artist/HSP/Empath/Neurodivergent/INFJ

Seek Beauty

• Plan Nature Adventures

• Go Outside Daily; Walk or Garden or Sit

• See the beauty in Your Home & Life

• Make time to cultivate Order in your Home & Life

• Collect and meditate on Beautiful True Thoughts

• Create astonishing/radical/spontaneous Beauty in Your life

• See Real & Messy Beauty

• Recognize and Cultivate Inner Soul Beauty

Be Still

• Know God

• What is God saying?

• Hide for a Purpose

• Find Rest for your Soul

• Blessings & Brokenness co-exist

• Stop striving for Perfection

• Take a Sabbatical (not Battle)

• Focus on God’s Goodness when Things Seem Bad

• Prioritize time for Healing

• Acknowledge what you are Starving for

Become like a Child

• Play

• Innocence

• Wonder

• See your Precious Life

Create!

• Pray

• Let go of Your Identity Titles

• Give up and Rest

• Be Inspired by Your Life

• Discover your purpose

• See the signs for Redirection

• What is Your destination?

• Let go of money as the final outcome

• Decide your boundaries for online creative presence. Try new ideas. Let go of what does not work for you. Honor your energetic boundaries.

• Believe in God’s safety & covering. Express yourself in this “safe” place and believe that it is enough and you are enough. 

• Do not require your play to make money or be useful. Do not require your healing to make money or be useful.

• Do you require an audience? Do you require money? Does God require your creativity to have an audience? Does God require you to make money (with your creativity)?

Desire a Wholehearted Creative Life; creativity that gives you joy!

Bonus for creative collaborations!

• Discover Your Creative Map; Hobby or Business? 

• Discover your Soul Purposes. Trust in God’s Plan for your Life.

• Study & Identify your beliefs about creativity, money and business. Identify the Higher Truth about these beliefs.

• Believe, fully, that God provides all that you need and all that is best. Believe that the “bad” things that happen in your life can cause/create a lot of good.

• Ask someone to Grieve and Lament with You (for all you have lost).

• Ask for help. From God, from others who have gone before you.

Heal Yourself

• Heal Yourself because you are helping to heal the world

• Heal Yourself first in order to help heal others

• Make Boundaries with the part of yourself that wants to inappropriately bear everyone’s burdens.

• Identify your feelings versus another’s feelings. 

• Look back on your life; consider carefully when someone else’s trauma or wound became your own. Let that baggage go. It isn’t yours. It does not belong to you.

• Listen, offer advice only if asked for

• Provide practical help you can truly offer without hurting yourself or your loved ones.

• It is not helpful to embody other’s feelings as if they belonged to you.

• Learn to address all your feelings with kindness & empathy. (Like a school bus driver with all the kids on the bus). Learn to find the “Higher” Truth for all “bad” feelings.

• Do not be afraid of future “bad” feelings. The Truth will set you free.

• Cultivate boundaries in all your routines so that you can be proud that “you are always doing the best you can.”

• Start each day fresh. Start each week fresh. Let go of mistakes. You are human. Acknowledge, give grace to yourself and others for being human.

• Ask & Believe for Protective Covering. When you feel “unsafe” and “uncovered” - move toward safety.

• Journal your thoughts and feelings almost every day.

• Notice the whispers that are guiding you

• Notice which direction you seem to be guided

• Most Important: Engage in an ongoing Strategy to Heal your Fears

• Lean Into Your Spark. Over and over again :) 

• What is Life Asking of you? …whilst Being Who You Are.

• Recognize your growth. Cultivate discernment

• STAY CREATIVE!!

Check out these resources for creative & spiritual growth!

*This post is an outline of my beautiful creative journey starting in 2014. Many of the titles are from blog posts (from Country Cottage Living).

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These first two resources lean more toward spiritual and self help. Highly recommend! 10 stars. This work is essential to creative growth.

Transformation Time Self-Help Course by Monica Sabolla

Byron Katie’s “The Work”

You will learn to take full responsibility for your happiness, your thoughts and your dreams.

These resources are all about making the art:

The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron 

The Creative Act by Rick Rubin

Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert Additional resources Podcast

Steven Pressfield The War of Art , Youtube interview phenomenal

Express yourself more fully, discover your purpose, consider higher truths, be an Artist, do the work, etc.

You will learn to help yourself and establish creative and spiritual tools and practices in your life. 

Brilliant Podcast putting my two fav topics together; The Deep Place; On Creativity & Spirituality Podcast Joel Mckerrow

A few years ago I gave up on in-person counseling/therapy and was able to help myself with the above resources. Now I have an inner work routine that involves morning pages, a fears and truths list, daily walks and a creative practice. I am a highly sensitive person, an INFJ, Enneagram 4 and an artist.

Creativity and spiritual growth seem to be directly intertwined in my experience!

The world is not coming at you. It is coming from you.